“Personal responsibility takes rejecting the pain and hurt we learned as children and deciding to create a new legacy of success, kindness, and love.”My response on a Facebook Statement of Relationship between Choices and Origin (of Responsibility and Decision-Making)
― Charles F Glassman
― Charles F Glassman
Our past - especially our development as a child, will have an impact on our emotional development / decision-making (or the lack thereof). Someone with a diagnosed (or undiagnosed) personality disorder i.e. Borderline Personality Disorder / or any other (mood) disorder on the Cluster B Personality Disorder spectrum - as per DSM IV criteria and diagnosis (Borderline Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Histrionic Personality Disorder, Antisocial Personality Disorder and comorbid with Bipolar I / II Disorders) will be impacted on choices he / or she will make especially in relation to other people (in close and or family relationships) - due to unresolved childhood trauma / neglect.
Therefore, an underdeveloped sense of self could lead to (severe) impaired emotions and decision-making. People with Cluster B Disorders generally lack emotional intelligence, have an incoherent sense of identity, low level of empathy towards others and could succumb to irrational personal relationship decision-making (due to these identity deficiencies - as a distorted reference to sense of self).
Even people with addictions (as a choice / decision - that could impact decisions in close relationships with other people) could be traced back to childhood psychological, sexual and verbal abuse, trauma and / or neglect. Parents / care givers play a vital role in the emotional development of the child - if there was i.e. love, care, gratitude, respect and peace in the family environment the child (and adult later) should have a more coherent and healthy approach in his / her future relationships (and mindful emotional state / decision-making) - in the absence of love, care, gratitude and peace, the child (and later adult) could be severely impaired with regard to i.e. no empathy towards others, ingratitude, poor decision-making, lack of remorse and diminished sense of self.
It does not mean someone with impaired decision-making should be excused - it means that the 'healthy' individual in relation to them should be mindful that there are indeed real reasons why impaired decision-makers make their 'as is" decisions without a rational conscience, responsibility and or lack of gratitude / remorse. You may find these individuals make decisions out of anger, lack of confidence and identity deficiency (or poor self worth).